04.17.00
01.08.04

Dear God,
There are a lot of things I’d like to know.
Like, how come I don’t have a penise? Or at
least the ability to pee standing up? Why do I
still have such strong feelings for Alice, and why
am I having so many problems getting along
with her beau? Am I going to see or hear from
Chris Welsh again? Why do I fantasize about
women and sleep with men? Why is it so hard
for me to meet women at all? I would just
really like a couple of girlfriends to laugh and
hang out with....Sassi and Fiona and all are
nice, but I would really, really like some
girlfriends a little closer to my own age, and not
so straight. I don’t really have anyone to compare
experiences with as far as all that goes, and I
have the feeling I would be a lot less confused
if I did. And oh, why is my dad such an
asshole? Why don’t I have wings? Why is my
body such a mystery to me? Where did all the
scars come from? How do I know if I’m doing
with my life as I should be? Why haven’t
you struck Billy Graham with a lightening bolt yet?
Is Jesse Helms the Anti-Christ? And many, many
more. Thanks for listening.
Shayna Maydela